Pain

This is not easy. My heart is broken. All my friends mean well. They say, "Well you know you can make it through the hard part. You know you can get pregnant."

NO the hard part is carrying the baby! The hard part is losing the baby! *sigh* I have a few friends who have been through this sadness, and they know the grieving process. And for them I am grateful. I will carry this with me for the rest of my life in my heart. We will try again in a few months. For now, I will cherish my little family and take time for myself.
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  God, We remember all babies who have died as a result of miscarriage. We remember all mothers and fathers whose hearts are aching and arms empty, who never had a chance to love or hold their babies. We ask God’s healing to fill the void and emptiness that has been left. Amen
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 My Lord, the baby is dead ! Why, my Lord – dare I ask why ? It will not hear the whisper of the wind or see the beauty of its parents’ face – it will not see the beauty of Your creation or the flame of a sunrise. Why, my Lord ?

 “Why, My child – do you ask ‘why’ ? Well, I will tell you why You see, the child lives. Instead of the wind he hears the sound of angels singing before My throne. Instead of the beauty that passes he sees everlasting Beauty – he sees My face. He was created and lived a short time so that the image of his parents imprinted on his face may stand before Me as their personal intercessor. He knows secrets of heaven unknown to men on earth. He laughs with a special joy that only the innocent possess. My ways are not the ways of man. I create for My Kingdom and each creature fills a place in that Kingdom that could not be filled by another. He was created for My joy and his parents’ merits. He has never seen pain or sin. He has never felt hunger or pain. I breathed a soul into a seed, made it grow and called it forth.” 

 I am humbled before you, my Lord, for questioning Your wisdom, goodness, and love. I speak as a fool – forgive me. I acknowledge Your sovereign rights over life and death. I thank You for the life that began for so short a time to enjoy so long an Eternity. 
 -Mother M. Angelica