Ephesians 5:21-24 Be subordinate to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is head of his wife just as Christ is head of the church, he himself the savior of the body. As the church is subordinate to Christ, so wives should be subordinate to their husbands in everything.
Be subordinate to one another. How would this work? As Christians, it would mean we put others first. We should not have a selfish attitude but act as a team. This might mean being sincerely happy for someone who is succeeding even if we are not. As Christians we are no longer individuals. We are all in God’s army. Which means we are under rank of the church and should follow the rules of the church. Just as when someone joins the army, we essentially have signed away our “right” to decide what we want to do with our life, with our body, with our soul. We have to give that to God completely. We have to realize that we are not more important that the team as a whole.
Paul is trying to make a parallel connection in Christian marriage between husband and wife to the relationship between Christ and the church. The wife should serve her husband in the same way as the church serve’s Christ. The husband should in turn care for his wife as Christ cares for the church. Again, in a marriage, we are part of a team. The individual is not more import than the team. Submission means we are agreeing to be under the mission of God for marriage. To obey and glorify God a husband and wife. Not being below or inferior to our husband, but below the mission God has for our life.
Wives are called to support their husbands as a pillar supports a roof. We are to support him in his mission to serve the Lord. We need to fully abandon our love of self for the love of our spouse. This works both ways. Again, our self wants and desires should not be more important than the team, the unit, the marriage.
This submission is NOT a free-for-all for a husband to be abusive or neglectful in any way. Our mission is to love our spouse as Christ loved the church. Turn to Corinthians 13 to recall what love is:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
There is so much I could say on this topic, but I would be here for days. Do not fear the word submission. Read your Bible. Find good Christian studies on true submission, and what it really means. Here is one of the many posts I have read: https://loveworthchasing.com/2021/08/14/should-a-wife-be-submissive-to-her-husband/?fbclid=IwAR1Ur9IrQAaQAfEECvuh6TFKx0EjvrG-sH9oazFjPOCq3uZqtudeLdCm-zI
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